let these jokes bring laughter to you..=)
What is the biggest ant in the world? An elephant!
Why did the kid study in an airplane? He wanted a higher education!
Why do birds fly south in the winter? Because it's too far to walk!
What runs but never walks? Water!
What kind of car does Mickey Mouse's wife drive? A Minnie van!
How did Noah see the animals on the Ark at night? With flood lights!
That’s A Fine Pig You’ve Got There
Farmers Brown and McDonald were sitting on Farmer McDonald's porch discussing plowing technique when Farmer Brown notices a pig with a wooden leg hobbling across the front yard. He turned to his friend and asks, "Say, Henry, how'd that pig get him a wooden leg?"
"Well, John, that pig...," his eyes mist up, "That pig's a mighty special pig! A few weeks back a wild boar attacked me while I was walking in the woods. That pig there came a runnin', went after that boar and fought him off. Saved my life!"
"And the boar tore up his leg?" "No, just got a few scratches, nothing serious. But that night the barn caught fire. That ol' pig started squealin' like he was stuck, woke us up, and 'fore we got out here, the darn thing had herded the other animals out of the barn and saved 'em all!"
"So that's when he hurt his leg, huh, Henry?" "No, John, the next day my tractor hit a rock and rolled down the hill into the pond. I got knocked clean out. When I came to, that pig had dove into the pond and dragged me out."
"...but that's not how he hurt his leg." "Oh no, no, he was fine. Cleaned him up real nice, too."
"Okay, Henry. So just tell me. How did he lose his leg?"
"Well", the farmer tells him, "A pig that good, you don't want to eat all at once."
"Well, John, that pig...," his eyes mist up, "That pig's a mighty special pig! A few weeks back a wild boar attacked me while I was walking in the woods. That pig there came a runnin', went after that boar and fought him off. Saved my life!"
"And the boar tore up his leg?" "No, just got a few scratches, nothing serious. But that night the barn caught fire. That ol' pig started squealin' like he was stuck, woke us up, and 'fore we got out here, the darn thing had herded the other animals out of the barn and saved 'em all!"
"So that's when he hurt his leg, huh, Henry?" "No, John, the next day my tractor hit a rock and rolled down the hill into the pond. I got knocked clean out. When I came to, that pig had dove into the pond and dragged me out."
"...but that's not how he hurt his leg." "Oh no, no, he was fine. Cleaned him up real nice, too."
"Okay, Henry. So just tell me. How did he lose his leg?"
"Well", the farmer tells him, "A pig that good, you don't want to eat all at once."
source: http://www.funnyandjokes.com/
p/s: =)
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